HAT // BRIXTON
SHIRT // VINTAGE
JEANS // MADEWELL
BOOTS // JEFFREY CAMPBELL
BAG // GIVENCHY
HAT // BRIXTON
SHIRT // VINTAGE
JEANS // MADEWELL
BOOTS // JEFFREY CAMPBELL
BAG // GIVENCHY
I spend most of my days in PJs. Who needs to actually get dressed when you spend your days at home playing with a messy toddler. I mean one things for sure, I can no longer wear something nice just to hang out, because frankly who wants to spend their time trying to get stains out of clothing you actually like. Then there is also the issue of not fitting into most all of my pre pregnancy clothing, so sweats also seem like the logical choice lol. My life has drastically changed and Im still trying to accept it. Having a child truly changes you in so many ways. My body, my self care, my lifestyle, it has all changed.
I used to get all dolled up for work and for nights out on the town. I enjoyed taking photos of my outfits and going to explore new places. I liked being a part of the scene and being seen. I still like those things, except now I don’t get the chance to do them much, and now I feel out of place when I do them. Now when I need to get ready to go out, one part of me is excited at the chance to get out and the other is dreading finding something to wear. Getting dressed has become very unpleasant for me, I just judge my body and become depressed over the way I look. But when I think about life in PJs, I think about my son. He doesn’t see my outfit or the bags under my eyes. He sees his loving mom, his goofy best friend, and his favorite snuggle buddy! It’s sweet to have someone unconditionally love you in all your hot mess glory. The moments we spend together are priceless and so worth all the changes Im currently complaining about. How do you juggle the old you, with the new you? In today’s society, it is too hard to not care about appearances. I know I can still be everything to my son and still put myself together but why is it so hard? This must be a phase new moms go through. I guess I’m still trying to figure it all out.
Today I didn’t change out of my pajamas. I think this is probably common for stay at home moms. On the one hand, it feels great not to have to get yourself ready, but on the other it’s very depressing. When I put myself together, I generally feel good about myself and lately having to look at my hot mess self isn’t helping my self esteem. I’m in dire need of a manicure and haircut. I still can’t fit into lots of my pre pregnancy clothing and I’m not sure I ever will. I dwell on these things instead of just getting my shit together. To get myself out of this funk, I’ve decided to set a better schedule for myself. My daily routine revolves around my child but I need to be able to squeeze in that self care.
I didn’t take a single picture of me holding my baby when he was born. I have maybe two pictures of me holding him for the first three months of his life. I didn’t want to be photographed because I felt terrible about the way I looked. Those photos could of been just for me and not for social media and now, I regret having taken none. This new year, I hope to take more photos of my son and I. I also will try to document more of his milestones, because I’ve been poor at doing so thus far. He is only a year old but I look back at his photos and think about how much he has grown. I want to be able to have all these memories captured without fearing that the photos look bad. This need to have perfect photos has really made it difficult to enjoy the moment itself. I get so wrapped up in the perfect shot that I either don’t take any or put a lot of pressure on taking the perfect one. I didn’t even send a family Holiday card because I was afraid of being judged and I thought my photos didn’t look good enough. It’s crazy how much this has affected me.
Another year has flown by and I’m still an awful blogger. Every year when it’s time to make new year resolutions, I contemplate this blog. I’m not consistent and I never invest the time. The truth is I compare myself with others and it discourages me from continuing on. I actually was not going to renew this blog but it turns out the auto pay was set up and it renewed for this year lol. So I guess you’ll be hearing from me just a little while longer?! Seriously though, I thought to myself, this blog gets no love because I constantly think I’m not good enough, interesting enough.. I’ve become so incredibly picky with everything I share. There are so many bloggers and I think about how it’s so saturated, that what could possibly set me apart from the rest?! All I ever do is compare and it’s becoming so damaging.
It’s hard to find real content nowadays. Social media has turned everything into filters and appearances. When I scroll my feed, all I see is fake and more fake. It’s hard not to get sucked into it all. So this year I think I’m going to focus on loving myself more and comparing myself to others less. Hopefully I’ll be able to share this years journey with you more and be less afraid of vulnerability and judgement.
My son Luc is now 6 months old! Where does the time go? While I'm just starting to get the hang of motherhood, it still feels so odd that I'm a MOM. My heart has never felt a love like this before. I spend most of my days in my pjs, entertaining this little human. At this stage, he is so chatty, really grabby, and incredibly smiley! He rolls over and has just started to sit up by himself. The bond a mother and child have is truly an incredible thing. Anyways this post was inspired by last nights bedtime. Last night my husband was on bedtime duty, and while he was putting our child to bed, I thought...
I laid in bed and thought about our son. I'm not sure if this makes any sense, but I missed our son. He was only in the next room, but it was hard to just wait in bed. I wanted to take over and be the one to snuggle him tight while he fell asleep. I've been the one to put him to bed every night, and I wanted to share in this duty to occasionally give myself a little break and for my husband to figure out his own bedtime routine. A break is extremely important for a stay at home mom, or for any mom for that matter. So why was I thinking about forfeiting that? I'm a crazy lady. I spend all my days with this little nugget and all day long, I yearn for just a little break. The second I get that break, all I can think about is my baby. Motherhood is a crazy thing.
This LA heat is inspiring me to write about Palm Springs! You may remember a previous post of mine about a girls trip I took with my sister and cousin to Palm Springs. Well we did it again, but this time around went to a few new spots. Also on this trip, my sister and I are both pregnant. This year, I missed Coachella because I didn't feel comfortable being pregnant in the hot dusty desert and because my gurl Beyonce backed out. I almost always go to Coachella, making my visit to Palm Springs an annual thing. It was only fitting that I do it a bit differently this year and so here is a recap of our preggo style trip haha.
OUR STAY / WHERE WE ATE:
We stayed right down the street from the Saguaro (where we stayed last) at the ACE hotel. Although it was my sister and cousin's first time staying there, I have previously stayed there with friends. I much prefer the restaurant on site and they offer better drinks and food poolside than the Saguaro. We got the nachos and caesar salad by the pool and it was just a perfect snack, not to mention the service was great. We also liked that they serve Clover juice ( bonus for pregnant ladies, that can't get fun cocktails but want something refreshing.) As far as restaurants, we ate at Cheeky's and Birba of course, because they are not to be missed when visiting Palm Springs! We happen to try out Appetito, The Farm, Reservoir, Ice cream and Shop(pe), and Lappert's. We enjoyed that Appetito was right next door to the hotel. The food was good and they give quite large portions. The Farm is a good place to eat for breakfast or brunch. We liked their crepes and farm house flair. As for Reservoir (a restaurant in the new Arrive Hotel that just opened this summer,) we were disappointed in their petite lunch menu, but mostly that the food and service wasn't good. Ice Cream & Shop(pe), also in the Arrive Hotel was quite cute and although the ice cream flavors were somewhat basic, it was a nice treat. Lappert's on the other hand is quite yummy! They serve up the famous Dole Whip, which is so refreshing in 100 degree heat.
Since we've pretty much done it all at this point, we didn't do much but eat, relax and lounge! This summer, Palm Springs had some very cool art installations put in place. We decided to visit DESERT X and it was a very cool experience. The mirrored house was so very neat and photo worthy! In these photos I'm 25 weeks and my sister is 28 weeks! I can't believe how the time has flown. I'm currently 35 weeks and very anxious to meet my baby!
Hat // Lack of Color
Dress // Anthropologie
Shoes // Soludos
Swimwear // Alma Vistoso
Sunnies // Rayban
I announced the gender on Instagram, but never officially on my blog. We are having a baby boy! When people would ask me if I thought it was a boy or a girl, I always said boy. I just felt like I was gonna have a boy. My husband on the other hand, would always reply girl. He thought because he wants a boy first, he'll get a girl. But that wasn't the case and he is beyond excited that it's a boy. He actually wasn't present at the doctors appointment the day I found out, because he was on his way back from Coachella. I contemplated playing a trick on him, but I'm not a good liar and I couldn't contain the news.
Here are photos of my 23 week bump! All the clothing in this post is non-maternity! YAY :)
Dress // Forever21
Jacket // NastyGal
Purse // Givenchy
Shoes // Nike
Sunnies // Rayban
I know that I' am awful at consistently posting, but I've been especially awful at it during my pregnancy. As I mentioned in the previous post, maternity wear is really not cute. It is actually really hard to feel pretty when all you want to do is dress like a bum. Even when I manage to get myself done up, I still don't feel pretty because I'm not used to seeing myself pregnant and I feel "fat." I've noticed that a lot of people are currently pregnant in my life (must be the age) and on all my social media. Many bloggers that I follow are announcing their pregnancies, and it is hard not to compare myself to them. Every pregnancy is different and I don't want to advertise a falseness to mine. I can't wear the clothing I used to and be comfortable, and I wont spend my $ on overpriced maternity clothing. My freckles are in full force and my nose is always red. I'm just not feeling like my fashionista self at the moment and that is ok. Rather I'm focused on watching my baby grow and preparing for his arrival. As my husband says: " I've been non-stop! " I nag him daily with new home projects and preparing our nursery (post to follow.)
Anyways, I'm 32 weeks +2 today! I'm getting a little closer to my due date and to getting my body back haha. In the meantime however, I'll try to recap the last 10 weeks as much as I can and I will also post about all my home renovations, my nursery and baby shower! Be sure to keep an eye out! XO
I live in maternity leggings and tees. Here is where it all began, my 21 week bump!
Hat // Monique's Boutique
Shirt // Gap maternity
Leggings // Nordstrom rack purchase
Shoes // VANS
I've been having trouble posting. I want so desperately to take cute outfit pics and dress up to go out, but it's just not gonna happen. Every time I put something on that I think will look cute and flattering, I end up looking like a potato. I'll schedule to shoot and then cancel because I'm too tired and have zero energy to do my hair and makeup. Ok Ok.. by now your probably like WHA? Well Guys, I'm pregnant! I haven't made a formal announcement on my social media yet, but I have so much to say about getting dressed while being pregnant. What a pain! You thought you didn't have clothes to wear before, well when your pregnant it's a million times more complicated than that. I'm so excited to be pregnant but the maternity clothing available is truly horrendous. Maternity clothing is actually really pricey for being so ugly. Women still buy it though, out of necessity. I purchased my first maternity clothing the other day and although I wasn't thrilled with the stuff, I figured I could add my personal touch to the otherwise simple pieces. I'm hoping when I actually have a bump, it will get a little easier because I'll look pregnant and wont be so subconscious about looking like I'm just overweight. For now it's anything flowy and oversized! Here is an outfit that I recently posted on my IG a few weeks ago (still in my first trimester,) when I wasn't really showing much but was very bloated and fatigued haha.
Top // Bought in Thailand ( similar ones at ZARA)
Pants // ZARA
Bag // Chloe
Shoes // Lola Shoetique